(Video uploaded 05/2023)

Transcript

Heading: Your Encouragement Counts – Raising Your Child with Positive Parenting

Narrator: Your Encouragement Counts – Raising Your Child with Positive Parenting

As a parent, is it your hope to raise a confident child who can face difficulties with courage and persistence? In fact, this is one of the goals in Positive Parenting.

Super: D-E-A-R; Encouragement and Praise

Narrator: Positive Parenting emphasises the importance of taking the child's perspective, and guiding their development in positive ways. It comprises the 4 elements of D-E-A-R. The focus of this video is E that stands for Encouragement and Praise, through which parents can show their child their support and appreciation, and boost their child's self-esteem and resilience.

Even before your child can fully understand your words, they can sense how you feel about them. Think about how you express your love to your child. By smiling at them all the time? Hugging? Kissing? Or telling them they're adorable? Starting from birth, the love and care from those around the child is supporting their development of self-esteem.

In addition to expressing their love, parents can guide children to cooperate through praise. You may think, "Well, I do praise them by saying Good or Well done." But these praises are too vague for them to understand what you appreciate them for. Try to be specific about what they have done well. Say, "You held my hand and walked slowly. Thank you! "

Also, if you praise only the outcomes, such as when your child wins an award or performs better than other children, they may develop a fear of failure or trying.

Try to appreciate your child's efforts or the positive qualities they show in the process. Like, "You were very attentive when you were drawing just now!" or "It was very caring of you to pass a tissue when you saw your brother crying!"

Note that children can tell if parents are sincere or not through their tone and gestures. Let's say a child finishes their meal by themselves, and if their parent says with arms crossed, "It would be awesome if you didn't need to be fed every time." they may not feel encouraged. But if the parent tells them with a smile, "You've done a great job eating by yourself!", they would feel appreciated.

In face of challenges, children need their parents' encouragement too. For example, your child tries to twist a towel but isn't strong enough, you can encourage them to try through praise, such as "I see you keep trying even though it is so hard! Well done!"

Besides, you can also give them some hints to help them persist, like, "Let's try this. Hold both ends tight, and twist it hard! There you go! Great job!"

You can also offer help by folding the towel for them first to make the task easier. By providing encouragement and guidance in this way, parents can support children to face challenges positively.

Parents do not need to wait until their child has accomplished anything extraordinary to praise them. Once you notice that they are willing to try or cooperate, praise and encourage them right away. Together with other elements of Positive Parenting, your child will gradually develop a positive self-image.

To learn more about the other elements of Positive Parenting, watch the other videos in the series of Parenting with DEAR. You could also visit the website of Family Health Service, Department of Health at www.fhs.gov.hk for more parenting resources.

This video is produced by the Family Health Service of the Department of Health